Search for Terrestrial Intelligence

So, I signed up for another dating service, whereby the computer chooses who it thinks you will enjoy meeting.  Out of somewhere over 100 women it suggested I might enjoy knowing, seemingly only one said that she liked intelligent and articulate men (and presumably people as well).

I said: “hey, want to chat?”, she clicked “OK, sure”, Over a couple of weeks, I wrote three notes, being polite, hoping to come across as verging on intelligent and/or articulate, and hoping to start a conversation.  Nary a response, until one day, when she clicked the “close match” button.

Perhaps I don’t seem as intelligent or interesting in print as I hope I do.  Or perhaps the matching computer is not as smart as it thinks it is. That must be it, it couldn’t possibly have anything to do with me. Or just be one of those things. Technology is out to get me.

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Technology Makes Our Lives Easier

Just keep repeating that to yourself – “Technology Makes Our Lives Easier” – and maybe someday you’ll believe it.

Meeting people – internet dating – a good thing? a bad thing?

Meeting people is good.  I think perhaps this internet dating thing isn’t.

Are most people really that uninteresting?  Or is it that they won’t (or can’t) put any effort into describing themselves?  Or they don’t understand the idea of “putting your best foot forward”?

Proliferation: linkedin, facebook, flickr, orkut, blogs (guilty), forums.  How can so many mechanisms be a good thing?

Kurt Vonnegut, Jr., was right:

“Electronic communities build nothing. You wind up with nothing. We’re dancing animals. How beautiful it is to get up and go do something.”

(I’ve been trolling them dating sites again, as I seem to do periodically, and not being all that optimistic about it.)

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Control

I’m a technical guy — I like to think that life is rational and controllable.

Relationships are inherently uncontrollable.

I’ve been trying to expand my circle of friends.  Yes, using that wonderful invention, Internet dating.  Some times, I’ll be trading mail with someone, and then suddenly (seemingly) never hear from them again.  Having done nothing (so far as I know) objectionable or unexpected.

This lack of control does not always sit well with me.  So it goes.

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Alone

“Because nothing sucks more than feeling all alone, no matter how many people are around you.”
— “John ‘J.D.’ Dorian” in the TV series “Scrubs”, the “My T.C.W.” (Tasty Coma Wife) episode.

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Fun for One

Much of what is thought to be fun seems to be oriented to more than one.

I mean, independence is nice and all that, but it sure is more fun to share an experience rather than just enjoy it solo.

But when one’s very particular about the company one keeps, one often ends up keeping one’s own company.  Or so it seems to me anyway.

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Almost Too Quiet

When the kids are here, there’s always something to do – feeding, driving, laundry, playing, reading, sending to bed.  It’s busy, but it’s fun.

When the kids aren’t here, it’s quiet, almost too quiet, and there seems to be less motivation to get things done, and more inertia.

Kids: nature’s anti-inertia.

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Do It Right, or Cover Your Butt?

I am a computer geek, at a large international company, in a central services group.  I am but a small cog in a big wheel (sadly not a “Big Wheel” (TM)).

I am your typical technical person: there’s a right way and a wrong way to do things; if it’s worth doing, it’s worth doing well; information should be shared, not hoarded; power games are sub-optimal; and all that.

I try to gently push the things I’ve learned in 20 years of being a sysadmin. Document, share, keep people informed, track, use tools.

It’s frustrating to be having such trouble convincing others to do good — do a good job, do interesting things, do things well. It seems to be especially difficult when the team leader’s only apparent motivation is to keep asses covered, and avoid any possibility of blame if something ever goes wrong.

Yup — that’s the safe way.  But walking around all day ducking, kowtowing, and reflexively saying “Yes Sir!” to anyone further up the food chain seems like not a good way to spend the day.

Oh well. There’s dumb stuff everywhere, you just choose the dumb stuff you’re willing to put up with.

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You may face obstacles to intimate communication

I subscribe to a daily horoscope (yeah, yeah, I know).  Today’s was headlined “you may face obstacles to intimate communication”.

I think my biggest obstacle is being a single dad who has always been very particular about his friends and is, as I concluded last year, a bit of an “acquired taste”.

That combination seems to make an active and fulfilling social life a little bit of a long shot some days.

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Why Oh Why

Everyone has a blog. Now I do too.

A long time ago I copied this down:

“Home pages are the pet rock of the 90s. We all have them, we all think they’re very cute. But in a few years we’re going to look back and be pretty embarrassed.”
— Tony Shepps (who at one time had the email address of toad in the domain pond.com)

Somehow that seems relevant here.

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